An air carrier airbus captain reported that when he attempted to name a takeoff alternate the dispat...

Attributes
ACN	810105
Time
Date	200810
Local Time Of Day	1801 To 2400
Place
Locale Reference	airport : zzz.airport
State Reference	US
Aircraft 1
Operator	common carrier : air carrier
Make Model Name	Airbus Industrie Undifferentiated or Other Model
Person 1
Affiliation	company : air carrier
Function	flight crew : captain oversight : pic
Qualification	pilot : atp
Events
Anomaly	non adherence : company policies non adherence : published procedure non adherence : far
Independent Detector	other flight crewa
Resolutory Action	none taken : unable
Supplementary
Problem Areas	Company
Primary Problem	Company

Narrative:

When I called dispatch to discuss takeoff alternates; dispatch said he had no idea what airports were in our alternate book; and suggested I simply return to field should I have an emergency after takeoff. Dispatcher was not focusing on the kind of field and the services available at the field he was dispatching from -- to the extent his solution for a departure non normal was not a common sense response. His plan was for me to return to a field with no tower; a relatively short field; no ability to turn the aircraft 180 degrees; and reduced emergency services on a part 91 flight plan. This would have worked for a C150; but ridiculous for an airbus. I have no idea why a professional would have come up with this idea; and have no idea of what airports nearby were in our alternate manuals.

Original NASA ASRS Text

Title: AN AIR CARRIER AIRBUS CAPTAIN REPORTED THAT WHEN HE ATTEMPTED TO NAME A TAKEOFF ALTERNATE THE DISPATCHER WAS UNABLE TO HELP WITH AIRPORT SELECTION AND SUGGESTED JUST RETURNING TO THE DEPARTURE AIRPORT.

Narrative: WHEN I CALLED DISPATCH TO DISCUSS TKOF ALTERNATES; DISPATCH SAID HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT ARPTS WERE IN OUR ALTERNATE BOOK; AND SUGGESTED I SIMPLY RETURN TO FIELD SHOULD I HAVE AN EMER AFTER TKOF. DISPATCHER WAS NOT FOCUSING ON THE KIND OF FIELD AND THE SVCS AVAILABLE AT THE FIELD HE WAS DISPATCHING FROM -- TO THE EXTENT HIS SOLUTION FOR A DEP NON NORMAL WAS NOT A COMMON SENSE RESPONSE. HIS PLAN WAS FOR ME TO RETURN TO A FIELD WITH NO TWR; A RELATIVELY SHORT FIELD; NO ABILITY TO TURN THE ACFT 180 DEGS; AND REDUCED EMER SVCS ON A PART 91 FLT PLAN. THIS WOULD HAVE WORKED FOR A C150; BUT RIDICULOUS FOR AN AIRBUS. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY A PROFESSIONAL WOULD HAVE COME UP WITH THIS IDEA; AND HAVE NO IDEA OF WHAT ARPTS NEARBY WERE IN OUR ALTERNATE MANUALS.

Data retrieved from NASA's ASRS site as of May 2009 and automatically converted to unabbreviated mixed upper/lowercase text. This report is for informational purposes with no guarantee of accuracy. See NASA's ASRS site for official report.

An air carrier airbus captain reported that when he attempted to name a takeoff alternate the dispatcher was unable to help with airport selection and suggested just returning to the departure airport.